Friday, June 22, 2007

I swore, but I make the rules, so there!

I swore I wasn’t going to say another word about Paris Hilton, but like a traffic accident we can’t tear our eyes away from the crazed woman.

NBC, hoping to bolster their sagging ratings, has offered Ms. Hilton a million bucks for a first-out-the door-interview.

Parental warning: adult content ahead. This is going to be ugly.

There’s no gentle way to say it; the minute Ms. Hilton hits the street, her mouth will be filled with fresh penis, and her nose will be overflowing with cocaine. The garbage she spewed about living a higher spiritual life was another camera-play. Jailhouse redemption takes a lot more than Paris is willing to give. This is tough adult talk, but God help us, it's exactly what'll happen. I wish I had a million bucks. Money for nothing would be good, and for those kind of bucks, I might do more than I'll freely and openly admit to.

I wish I had a million bucks to confess my sins. I've been a bad boy; never been a celebrity; never played one on TV. I've been a ne'er-do-well and a sinner; playing with my mortal soul ought to satisfy the home-viewer.

Staying in the grown-up mode for a moment; a quote from Sigourney Weaver finalizes all: "Who do I have to f--k to get off this boat?" Goodnight, Gracie.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ouch.

June 25, 2007 2:53 AM  
Blogger Beerme said...

Heh-Heh... I missed this infamous post and I had to go back and check it out. I thought it was apropos and funny but I got a sick sense of humor, ya know!

July 10, 2007 6:00 PM  

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