Bored Spitless
I guess I am in trouble. I put up the following post at ScrappleFace:
Eliot who? I am bored spitless by this story.
Where are the good ol’ days of Wilbur Mills cavorting with Fannie Fox, “The Argentine Firecracker”?
The longer I live, the more I become convinced that I am the only man in North America who never cheated on my wives.
A politician cheated on his wife? Wake me up when some real news, like the next Muslim-inspired attack/catastrophe, comes along. I like seeing tall buildings fall down; politicians fall every day. As Great Scott says, read the rest at United Possums International.
It is to laugh.
[Link to ScrappleFace at right below]
I was commenting, of course, on the governor of New York, who apparently couldn’t keep it zipped.
I think it’s a yawner. It was a lot more fun when celebrities like Fannie Fox were jumping off bridges in DC rather than get caught doing a lap dance with presidential cabinet ministers. I am sure George Bush is somehow responsible for this latest faux pas.
Conservatives have always been associated with morality, so when one gets caught with his pants down, there is a greater outcry.
On the home front, we had a sheriff in Cherokee County who had a dalliance with one of his secretaries, who happened to be married to a deputy. I wish I had been a bystander when the deputy literally called the sheriff out on the town square of Canton, Georgia.
(Nothing happened; the sheriff was restrained inside the courthouse, the deputy was told to move along.)
I have had jobs that have taken me all over the place; I also managed to stay married for 24 years. It never occurred to me to cheat on my wife; what is some strange woman going to give me that isn’t waiting at home? Since this is a family-friendly blog, we won’t pursue those particulars. Maybe my testosterone is low, although I never hesitated to engage in a smackdown when someone insulted my interracial friendships, or other aspects that they thought “questionable”. It just never occurred to me to “cheat”.
(I despise the term; “cheating” is what I’ll do to you in a game of cards, but win or lose at the card game, my baby will still be waiting in the getaway car. She might be driving it, and laying down covering fire.)
Both of my ex-wives were million-dollar women. The first—a young mistake—liked guys too much. The second and I have quite a history, and children. It just never occurred to me to “cheat”.
My lifelong friend and early mentor, Zandy McLeod, put it simply as a Zen lesson. “Birds gonna fly in the sky; fish gonna swim in the sea.” That translates to people are going to follow their natures, and as long as their treacheries are relatively benign, they should be allowed to do so. In Governor Spitzer’s case, however, he has broken existing laws, and must take responsibility for that. Not all laws are good ones, but if you run afoul of them, it’s on you to pay the penalty. The Governor of New York is now the ex-governor, and I suppose that is how it must be.
My wife was of Sicilian extraction. She was quite vengeful in seeking a divorce for lesser reasons than my “stepping out” on her. I don’t know Mrs. Spitzer from Adam’s housecat—as the saying goes—but if I had cheated on my old lady, the odds are good that I’d be taking the dirt nap instead of writing this article. Spitzer orchestrated his infidelities like one of the sophisticated criminal enterprises he used to prosecute. As Rickey Ricardo used to say to Lucy: “You gots a lot of ‘splianin’ to do”…at least on the home front.
Eliot who? I am bored spitless by this story.
Where are the good ol’ days of Wilbur Mills cavorting with Fannie Fox, “The Argentine Firecracker”?
The longer I live, the more I become convinced that I am the only man in North America who never cheated on my wives.
A politician cheated on his wife? Wake me up when some real news, like the next Muslim-inspired attack/catastrophe, comes along. I like seeing tall buildings fall down; politicians fall every day. As Great Scott says, read the rest at United Possums International.
It is to laugh.
[Link to ScrappleFace at right below]
I was commenting, of course, on the governor of New York, who apparently couldn’t keep it zipped.
I think it’s a yawner. It was a lot more fun when celebrities like Fannie Fox were jumping off bridges in DC rather than get caught doing a lap dance with presidential cabinet ministers. I am sure George Bush is somehow responsible for this latest faux pas.
Conservatives have always been associated with morality, so when one gets caught with his pants down, there is a greater outcry.
On the home front, we had a sheriff in Cherokee County who had a dalliance with one of his secretaries, who happened to be married to a deputy. I wish I had been a bystander when the deputy literally called the sheriff out on the town square of Canton, Georgia.
(Nothing happened; the sheriff was restrained inside the courthouse, the deputy was told to move along.)
I have had jobs that have taken me all over the place; I also managed to stay married for 24 years. It never occurred to me to cheat on my wife; what is some strange woman going to give me that isn’t waiting at home? Since this is a family-friendly blog, we won’t pursue those particulars. Maybe my testosterone is low, although I never hesitated to engage in a smackdown when someone insulted my interracial friendships, or other aspects that they thought “questionable”. It just never occurred to me to “cheat”.
(I despise the term; “cheating” is what I’ll do to you in a game of cards, but win or lose at the card game, my baby will still be waiting in the getaway car. She might be driving it, and laying down covering fire.)
Both of my ex-wives were million-dollar women. The first—a young mistake—liked guys too much. The second and I have quite a history, and children. It just never occurred to me to “cheat”.
My lifelong friend and early mentor, Zandy McLeod, put it simply as a Zen lesson. “Birds gonna fly in the sky; fish gonna swim in the sea.” That translates to people are going to follow their natures, and as long as their treacheries are relatively benign, they should be allowed to do so. In Governor Spitzer’s case, however, he has broken existing laws, and must take responsibility for that. Not all laws are good ones, but if you run afoul of them, it’s on you to pay the penalty. The Governor of New York is now the ex-governor, and I suppose that is how it must be.
My wife was of Sicilian extraction. She was quite vengeful in seeking a divorce for lesser reasons than my “stepping out” on her. I don’t know Mrs. Spitzer from Adam’s housecat—as the saying goes—but if I had cheated on my old lady, the odds are good that I’d be taking the dirt nap instead of writing this article. Spitzer orchestrated his infidelities like one of the sophisticated criminal enterprises he used to prosecute. As Rickey Ricardo used to say to Lucy: “You gots a lot of ‘splianin’ to do”…at least on the home front.
posted by Robert at 1:35 AM
2 Comments:
Just do as I did and stop watching the News. I get little notifications on my computer when something 'big' happens. Then I search for the story read as much of it as I can without gagging. I find I accidentally hear more "News" than I want to.
I did hear Martha Stewart on Letterman. She had attended some functionthat they wanted her to create a drink . She took a glass of white wineand put a squirt of soda in it and called it a "Spitzer".Old El was the one who took her down.Did you notice ,he can bite both lips.
Hey Possum,
Good title. I'm glad that Eliot is finally fading into the background.
Barb,
"he can bite both lips"... Funny!
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