Prisons?
I heard a great idea the other day.
My president, whom I no longer cut slack for, is closing that small piece of Cuba that we somehow retain. We keep people there who carry AK-47s, wear civilian clothes, and will kill you and your children as quickly as they can get you in their sights. I’d like to deploy the cliché that some of my best friends are Muslims, but aside from TC from LA, whom I mentored in the 1980s, it ain’t so. I’m finding that the older I get, the less I like anybody. Trust is out the window; be grateful I don’t open fire on you, and there is a pistol in every sock drawer.
John Boehner is rapidly becoming a hero. “Boner” stepped into light the other day when he nominated Alcatraz as the alternative place to send enemy combatants.
The Atlanta penitentiary was built between 1915 and 1917. I have seen long-lost photographs of its rising on Boulevard, in a section of Atlanta that now belongs to housing projects and massive urban garbage dumps.
I have heard every sort of excuse from every variety of psychopath and malfeasant individual. “I didn’t do it!” I have had a busman’s tour of almost every federal prison in the country. I have handed coats out to freezing convicts, patted them on the back, and boarded them on the bus. I have never primarily been a law-enforcement person, but the nature of my old day job required some on-the-spot interviews that took me from Minnesota to Miami. I have talked to some interesting people in my half-century on this planet.
Alcatraz, and USP-Leavenworth, Kansas, are modeled on the design of the Atlanta pen. We are beginning to have all sorts of flashbacks to the Jimmy Carter administration. I am watching president Obama’s approval rating slide downwards from 60+ percent. Oh, we’re waking up to the Manchurian Candidate now, are we?
Atlanta is remodeled now, after the greatest hostage crisis of the 20th century, thanks to Mr. Jimmy’s importation of Castro’s castoffs. If you remember your history, the Marielito Cubans took the place over in the 1980s, after years of torment and bogus news stories from the city’s NBC franchise. The Cubans settled, only a couple died, and USP-Atlanta now houses garden-variety convicts in relatively pleasant conditions.
Congressman Boehner made a simple suggestion. If President Obama is so damned intent on closing Gitmo, let’s reactivate Alcatraz. The island is still there; the cellblocks are still there.
Atlanta, Leavenworth, and Alcatraz were what we’d call “supermax” back in the day. Add Marion, Illinois to that list, and the federal death house in Terre Haute, Indiana. America has one of the largest percentages of incarcerated convicts in the world, and I’m hard-pressed to come up with anybody who doesn’t belong there. At least we don’t behave like China, parade them into a stadium during the Super Bowl, and give them a bullet in the neck at halftime.
Nancy Pelosi has superseded Hillary Clinton as the most dangerous woman in America. I have a personal saying: “Those bitches will get you every time.” I am an acknowledged misogynist. I trust no one.
Yeah, close Guantanamo Bay. Move 2,000 hard-core sociopaths around the country. Retain my cadre of lawyers to represent them. And you won the election on your God-given ability to rescue us from what economic crisis?
Madame Speaker Pelosi started shittin’ kittens, pardon my French, the moment Alcatraz was mentioned. It is, after all, anchored in San Francisco Bay. There’s a perfect backyard! Oh, no! Alcatraz is a tourist attraction! We can’t do that!
I think it’s perfect. Keep the tour boats running. Couple of dollars, and you view the rabid killer terrorists. Every tattooed, I-can-be-had mook in Bay City can go one-on-one with the fanatics they love and respect so much.
I am having too much fun with a one-party country. My amusement is only tempered by the fact that people are going to die. You bought it, you pay for it.
My president, whom I no longer cut slack for, is closing that small piece of Cuba that we somehow retain. We keep people there who carry AK-47s, wear civilian clothes, and will kill you and your children as quickly as they can get you in their sights. I’d like to deploy the cliché that some of my best friends are Muslims, but aside from TC from LA, whom I mentored in the 1980s, it ain’t so. I’m finding that the older I get, the less I like anybody. Trust is out the window; be grateful I don’t open fire on you, and there is a pistol in every sock drawer.
John Boehner is rapidly becoming a hero. “Boner” stepped into light the other day when he nominated Alcatraz as the alternative place to send enemy combatants.
The Atlanta penitentiary was built between 1915 and 1917. I have seen long-lost photographs of its rising on Boulevard, in a section of Atlanta that now belongs to housing projects and massive urban garbage dumps.
I have heard every sort of excuse from every variety of psychopath and malfeasant individual. “I didn’t do it!” I have had a busman’s tour of almost every federal prison in the country. I have handed coats out to freezing convicts, patted them on the back, and boarded them on the bus. I have never primarily been a law-enforcement person, but the nature of my old day job required some on-the-spot interviews that took me from Minnesota to Miami. I have talked to some interesting people in my half-century on this planet.
Alcatraz, and USP-Leavenworth, Kansas, are modeled on the design of the Atlanta pen. We are beginning to have all sorts of flashbacks to the Jimmy Carter administration. I am watching president Obama’s approval rating slide downwards from 60+ percent. Oh, we’re waking up to the Manchurian Candidate now, are we?
Atlanta is remodeled now, after the greatest hostage crisis of the 20th century, thanks to Mr. Jimmy’s importation of Castro’s castoffs. If you remember your history, the Marielito Cubans took the place over in the 1980s, after years of torment and bogus news stories from the city’s NBC franchise. The Cubans settled, only a couple died, and USP-Atlanta now houses garden-variety convicts in relatively pleasant conditions.
Congressman Boehner made a simple suggestion. If President Obama is so damned intent on closing Gitmo, let’s reactivate Alcatraz. The island is still there; the cellblocks are still there.
Atlanta, Leavenworth, and Alcatraz were what we’d call “supermax” back in the day. Add Marion, Illinois to that list, and the federal death house in Terre Haute, Indiana. America has one of the largest percentages of incarcerated convicts in the world, and I’m hard-pressed to come up with anybody who doesn’t belong there. At least we don’t behave like China, parade them into a stadium during the Super Bowl, and give them a bullet in the neck at halftime.
Nancy Pelosi has superseded Hillary Clinton as the most dangerous woman in America. I have a personal saying: “Those bitches will get you every time.” I am an acknowledged misogynist. I trust no one.
Yeah, close Guantanamo Bay. Move 2,000 hard-core sociopaths around the country. Retain my cadre of lawyers to represent them. And you won the election on your God-given ability to rescue us from what economic crisis?
Madame Speaker Pelosi started shittin’ kittens, pardon my French, the moment Alcatraz was mentioned. It is, after all, anchored in San Francisco Bay. There’s a perfect backyard! Oh, no! Alcatraz is a tourist attraction! We can’t do that!
I think it’s perfect. Keep the tour boats running. Couple of dollars, and you view the rabid killer terrorists. Every tattooed, I-can-be-had mook in Bay City can go one-on-one with the fanatics they love and respect so much.
I am having too much fun with a one-party country. My amusement is only tempered by the fact that people are going to die. You bought it, you pay for it.
posted by Robert at 1:13 PM
2 Comments:
I think that Alcatraz would have to be rebuilt, due to its current condition.
The prison, not the island...
In the old days, they'd use the prisoners to do the rebuilding...at shotgun point!
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